Many of the magazines and blogs I read share weekly food plans and diaries of celebrities and public figures. I eagerly review them, for tips and comparison with my own. Whenever I read one though, I find myself thinking: “Reallly?! You really had organic stir fry and scrambled tofu for lunch?” Every meal seems to involve half a day by the stove and zero casual snacking, let alone socialising. For most of people, cooking every meal fresh is awkward a-f and drawing out these perfect diets feels un-believable or achievable.
If we are what we eat, then sharing exactly what I’ve consumed, day by day, is a slightly bizarre, intimate thing, which may be of interest in years to come when future scientists  explore how wrong we got it in 2018. I’m also interested in seeing, how much I actually eat. Disclaimer, this is not recommended by a Doctor.
Day 1 (Monday 5th Feb 2018)
930am – Black Espresso w/ 1 teaspoon sugar
10am – Mini pain au chocolat, Mini croissant, 0.5 latte (regular milk)
1115am –  Oat Latte, 345g Vegan Granola Pot (Soya Yogurt, Lizi’s Granola, Mixed Berries)
12 – Handful of pecans
2pm – Salt and Vinegar Pop Chips (35g), Babaganoush Dip (half pot)
3pm – 345g Vegan Granola Pot (Soya Yogurt, Lizi’s Granola, Mixed Berries) (no typo, this is my second of the day), Black Coffee (instant)
345pm – Choc Truffle (brought back from Milan)
445pm – Another Choc Truffle
7pm – Courgetti Pesto (1x tsp pesto, 2x sun-dried tomatoes, 1 tbs olive oil, 1x courgette, half an iceberg lettuce)
730pm – 20g Oats with half a pear and cashew milk
0.5l water
BIG DAY for grazing – I was ill and tired after a weekend in Milan. I had a massive guilt complex the next say.
Day 2 (Tuesday 6th Feb 2018)
8am – Soya Latte

10am – 50g Porridge (Oats & Water)

1130 – Soya Latte

1300 – Vegetable and Lentil Dahl (small portion) with baby leaf salad

1430 – Matcha Latte (oat milk)

1530 – Choc truffle

2100 – ‘Super Green’ sandwich (from Sainsbury’s)

2l water

Feel much happier about this one! Used a little mindful-ness to avoid too much snacking. 
Day 3 (Wednesday 7th Feb 2018)

6am – Americano w/ cashew milk

8am –  Matcha Latte (almond milk)

10am – 50g Porridge (Oats & Water)
1130am – Americano w/ soya milk
1300 – Vegetable and Lentil Dahl (small portion) with baby leaf salad
1400 – Oat milk macchiato
1530 – Choc Truffle
1900 – 3 large glasses of white wine
2l water
Day 4 (Thursday 8th Feb 2018)
9am – Double Espresso iced latte (Starbucks on the go)
1030am – 50g oats w/ cashew milk & half a pear
11am – Slice of toast w/ peanut butter and soya latte

1130am – Slice of toast w/ peanut butter

1330 – Vegetable and Lentil Dahl (small portion) with baby leaf salad
1515 – Coconut and Blueberry Banana bread
1530 – Oat Latte (left half)
1915 – One carrot, 6 doritos and houmous
1930 – Salad of: courgette, iceberg lettuce, 1 tomato, olive oil, tsp pesto.
1945 – half a pear, mixed berries, cashew milk, 20g oats
Not a good day.
Day 5 (Friday 9th Feb 2018)
6am – Black coffee (instant
815 – Matcha latte (almond milk)
10am – 50g soaked oats (in water)
1130 – Soya Flat White
1330 – Lentil and veg dahl (small portion)
1400 – 1 Oreo thin
1430 – Green and Blacks Dark choc (35g)
1500 – Tumeric Latte with Almond milk
1630 – Handful salted crisps, few breadsticks and carrot sticks, hummus (birthday nibbles), glass of prosecco
1900 – 6 Doritos
2000 – Lentil ragu with a few pasta shells & green salad
2130 – Another Spoon of lentil ragu
2100-0015 – 3x gin and tonics, Diet Coke, 2x glasses prosecco, vodka and coke
0215 – berocca, white toast & avocado, lentil ragu on top
Day 6 (Saturday 10th Feb 2018)
1100 – 20g Oats and water, spoon of lentil ragu
1215 – 2x Slices Sourdough, avocado, green leaves, oat latte
1330 – Slice of banana and walnut bread, oat latte
1930 – Handful of almonds
2000 – Pasta with 1x fresh tomato, Olive oil, 4x mushrooms, garlic, mixed salad leaves, 1/4 avocado
2130 – Ovaltine light (instant)
2l water
Day 7 (Sunday 11th Feb 2018)
830 – 20g Buckwheat porridge (gross, couldn’t finish), 25g almonds
1045 – Half cup filter coffee w/ soya milk
1245 – Almond milk mocha, 2x Sourdough toast with generous portion of almond butter & pumpkin seeds
1705 – 40g crisps (Pipers Thyme & Rosemary), soda water w/ lime
1830 – Large Spoon Lentil Ragu
1930 – Whole Broccoli (steamed) with 1/2 avocado, salt, salad leaves, 2 tsp tahini, handful spinach
2000 – 1/2 pear, few berries, 20g Oats
2l water
So there we have it. A week in eats. Clearly sleep makes a big difference to my diet. I also have a questionable obsession with oats and am falling short on vegetables. Will try better next week Dr conscience.
Lexy is a writer, DJ and marketing professional living in London. She is a gemini and a feminist who loves coffee and leopard print.